Your attention please...

I don't think I'm depressed, I'm just... apathetic. And people are stupid, and I don't like dealing with them.

Um, yeah. Miscommunication is my favorite thing in the whole world.

I had a dream I got accepted to Emerson. I think that says how much I want to be out of here. Oh lordy me.

I can't explain anything I really want to on this page, and I'm beginning to think it's not worthwhile at all. But, it never really was. Hmm.

IRC is like a coffee shop.

I am a total loser.

Well, let me tell you. Since I had my exciting day off in which students go out and party or otherwise have fun, I decided that I would party by going to Ballard High School!! Mmm-hmm. I spent 5 hours working on my beautiful school newspaper no one apreciates, which entailed finishing my page, writing an article, redesigning A&E, replacing all the photos on A&E as well as rescanning them in that A&E was a origionally 50 megs and literally took a half an hour to print. We got it down to 20K, it just took a while.

By about two o clock I realized I had a pretty serious fever and that I really shouldn't be at school at all. But I went to rehersal because I said I would. And we sat there and did NOTHING. YES, THAT'S RIGHT, Ab-sa-fucking lutely nothing for an hour and ten minutes. Then Rosie yelled at us for not working. Working on what??!! oh, I don't know.

So then we crammed 4 scenes into 45 minutes with constant interruption about re-blocking the scene. Um, we're performing on monday dude. We are past the blocking stage.

So then I had to run around a whole bunch and got all dizzy and sicklike. Everyone else was hung over so they were grumpy that I wouldn't help them but I was this close to vomiting the whole time.

Then, finally, at 4, they let us go.

I went outside to call my mom but she wasn't in her office so I called her at home but she wasn't there either, but scott had paged so I asked if he would come get me. He said he would, so I went outside before realizing that it was raining as well as before realizing I would be locked out if I did this. Huh. So I sat for 10 minutes in the rain, shivering, wishing I had a cell phone.

Then Scott came and made me get tea before I went home and I got some lunch too. Since we hadn't seen each other in a week, I attempted to converse with him but I couldn't say anything more than incoherent babble about nothing. I felt like shit.

Scott recommended me coming home and going to sleep.

I did that. That was nice.

So that's the end of my shitty, terrible week and it's about to start up again.

Weekends are highly overrated. What kind of a weekend is it when I get the flu, have a 3 page paper to write and a genetics worksheet due monday? I want free time to be able to *sleep*. Is that too much to ask? Apparently.

UUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!

Happy birthday Andreas, you're the greatest. :)

Congratulations to me, I'm LA department scholar.

I'm having such a bad day. I can't explain it.

I offered to snort coke with Spencer today, but he didn't take me up on the offer. How rude.

My coffee this morning was so good. I considered going right back and buying another one.

Rosie and I are clashing like hell lately. We are trying to do that, "I'm uncomfortable around you but can still act civally towards you" thing but it ends up that we both just want to scream at each other loudly and remorselessly but we end all our phrases with curt lines. "Forget it." "It's just--nevermind." It's crazy. We try too much to supercede the other's opinion/authority/style/function. We're driving each other crazy. But we act nice about it.

Hmm. Life's quirky. Well, I understand that she's perky and /he's/ a turkey, but that's natalie's poor headline writing skills...

I got no sleep last night, and I'm tired, so I'm going to bed in the next 15 minutes and that's it.

It was a school day today, filled with everyfuckingthing. God I'm so busy. Today the drama teacher walked by me and said, "Hi, anne, do you have any time for yourself?" All i could respond was "no" as quickly as I could running down the stairs trying to do this or that with no sleep and not nearly enough coffee... Sigh.

ok, ok.

I showed the girls porn and ate cake.

Goodnight.

I had a really good time last night. I think i was out a bit too late, but I had fun. And almost famous is an excellent film, I loved it.

I skipped 3rd period today. Senioritis is totally setting in. I snatched Laura from her german class. She was there, all settled to work, and I was like, "psst! let's go!" We made a break for it--and succeeded! We are pimps.

We went to the place in which they make chai and other treats.

I've done some work for jsa, but more girl talking with laura. She's cool. She my buddy pal. Yeah.

My weekend is already consumed. Grumble. I hate that.

Hopefully they all will, I just work here otherwise. I'm going to sleep.

My day was so eventful, I practised and then I went to the dorms on a misbegotten mission for crumpets and nutella. Two stores later, we ended up with the latter and some russian tea cakes from whole foods. Dammit.

Then we went to BH and hung out with tyler, went to wendys and then I came home and played MASH with Laura.

I didn't do any work. I have a test tomorrow. For christ's sake, I suck. but I never shall worry. I know what jesus would do.

I'm digging bright eyes way too much right now.

THE MESS WE'RE IN

by PJ Harvey

So I went to Tacoma and only got slightly lost.

I was with quite a few underclassmen, which was really fun. It was like a blast from the past. It was, "remember how much fun you had in high school?"

We went to Rocky, and I'm officially not a virgin anymore, but I shouted more than half of the kids with me that had only gone once or twice before. Heh. I had fun, it was good times.

We had played twister and done the (hella bomb dairy queen)cake thing before all that, so we all went back to laura's somewhat dead. Let me rephrase: They were all somewhat dead and I was ready to drive to Beth's and get some (sniffle) mashed potatoes. But I got tired eventually (by 4:30...) and slept until 11.

I finally got in my car around 12:30, and now I'm home and not for long--I have a research project to be working on. Sigh.

Yesterday I stayed home from school, and in doing so drove my grandma downtown to put her in a shuttle to the airport (she's going to chicago), then I came back and got gas. After that little adventure, I went home and watched the rocky horror picture show, went to the dorms where I found tyler & scott playing ping pong. They decided to stop when the ball shattered.

We went upstairs to use the phone/get more ping pong balls, and I said hi to josh and camden, then I ran away becos I had to go pick up my mom. Then We went to scott's house and picked up a go board, and then we went on a mission to find food. Our mission was inspired by passing the KFC in B town. We decided we /had/ to go to ezelle's. An Hour later we both realized we didn't have much of a clue as to where it was. But we found it!! And had damn good chicken.

We went to Bauhaus after that and played a much better game of go than the previous. We are still trying to figure out how I lost a lot of territory that would have made the game even closer than it was. I think It was because I made a loose formation and then backed it up going in instead of out, which made it weaker because I lost all my liberties. yeah.

Then andreas & mle showed up as we were leaving, so I stopped and girl talked for a bit before being dragged out the door by scott. We found some anti corporate propoganda on our car, and then we were heading home. But we ended up not staying in our respective homes, because scott left his backpack in my car and then he, adam, andreas & I watched Things to do in Denver when you're dead. That was sloppily titled. Hmm.

I underwent a great deal of concern for the leadership of our faculty when they decided they would risk a certain death of walking under power lines (if there were an aftershock of significance as we evacuated) as opposed to walking within five feet of THE MOST STRUCTURALLY SOUND BUILDING IN SEATTLE.

But that's ok. Gym teachers are known to be stupid (cough cough, secretary of education cough cough cough).

I also had a great deal of concern for the other public high schools (ie pieces of shit that could crumble at any given moment anyway), but good ol joe olchefske decided if we could send em emails it'd be just fiiiine. And put elementary schoolers back in buildings bricks had just popped out of. Thank god that levy just passed.

That's all. I'm at Rehersal right now and boy isn't a lot getting done. I should go.

I underwent a great deal of concern for the leadership of our faculty when they decided they would risk a certain death of walking under power lines (if there were an aftershock of significance as we evacuated) as opposed to walking within five feet of THE MOST STRUCTURALLY SOUND BUILDING IN SEATTLE.

But that's ok. Gym teachers are known to be stupid (cough cough, secretary of education cough cough cough).

I also had a great deal of concern for the other public high schools (ie pieces of shit that could crumble at any given moment anyway), but good ol joe olchefske decided if we could send em emails it'd be just fiiiine. And put elementary schoolers back in buildings bricks had just popped out of. Thank god that levy just passed.

That's all. I'm at Rehersal right now and boy isn't a lot getting done. I should go.

What the fuck. I don't understand me. At all.

So It was school (read: hell) again today, and I have a two page "report" due tomorrow @ 2:30, but I just don't care. Senioritis is /really/ setting in right about now. Holy crap. March is the worst month right?

I'm thinking so many things, like what if this person had acted this way a year ago, what if I had thought this way about that four months ago, when will this all stop, why can't I just get that goddam person out of my head and where will I be when I do except completely lost.

Yeah, a combination of all of that is going through my head every five seconds. And I don't want to explain it to anybody because It's me and my life and I want to just deal with it but it's not working and I'm all crabby and shitty and weird.

Sometimes I wish I could just be a bitch, that might make life easy for me.